New Dad toolbox is not really a box

When I first heard about the new dad toolbox, I envisioned a real toolbox with actual things a dad might need. And what would those be? Earplugs, pacifiers, chocolate for mama, a razor to keep his stubble at bay, Purell no doubt?

Seeing the picture of the toolkit didn’t really change my expectations much — only now I figured there’d be different stuff in the kit: rubber ducky, baby bottle, baseball mitt, and a pacifier (got one right!).

But no, it’s a DVD. It’s not a box at all.

So I asked myself: Is this going to save new dads from misaligned expectations, general cluelessness, and paralyzing fear? Is this going to help the home of a new baby to be a more harmonious place?

I watched it myself in an afternoon. Armin Brott, AKA Mr. Dad, is giving a lecture to dads-to-be in an old classroom with a chalk board. The dads-to-be look on with interest and hold babydolls. Nobody speaks but Armin Brott. I found the information very helpful but wondered how much it would really benefit a new dad. How much of this does he already know? When would he watch this? When should he watch this?

In my own not-a-dad opinion, I would rather have The Expectant Father: Facts, Tips and Advice for Dads-to-Be or The New Father: A Dads Guide to the First Year (also by Armin Brott) because they would allow me access to the same information without having to devote an entire afternoon to watching it on TV. I could review the chapters as I wanted — with the benefit of the index and TOC — when I wanted. But I’m a new Mom not a Dad. So, I asked my husband, Alec, to watch it.

Having been the recipient of both aforementioned books, I expected Alec to agree with me. But, he didn’t. Nope. He said that it is great to watch a DVD. It doesn’t require as much time or attention as a book (to digest the information). He recommends watching it in five to ten minute chunks over the course of a week.

Rookie Dad Alec liked the overall content (”tons and tons of information”) — especially the bits about anger management and supporting the breastfeeding relationship — but found the lecture format a little dry. He thought was definitely full of topics that expectant dads would have “no clue” about presented in a realistic and calm manner.

The DVD could go further into connecting with a new baby (like you’ll have to really work at it to figure out your baby’s cries and that connection doesn’t always happen right away) and the emotional side of the experience. It’s also too bad the dads in the class aren’t given a voice.

Bottom Line: Rookie Dad recommends the DVD pre-baby (or within the first couple weeks), as a companion to the books - you probably won’t go back and reference this, but it sets a reasonable tone for ‘what to expect’…he suspects that you’d be able to recall 20% of it immediately afterwards, but once the baby is born a lot of it will come back.

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I was given a review copy of this DVD by Parent Bloggers. If you want to pick up this or any other title by Mr. Dad, check out mrdad.com and tell ‘em the rookie moms sent you.