April 2007

Everyone responds differently to pregnancy weight gain and subsequent pregnancy weight loss. Yeah, I know. And I guess each pregnancy responds differently too. Fine.

I’m a big believer in the nine months up and nine months down school of thought, but I have to admit I’m just real impatient! At this point (seven weeks and one day out), I don’t even have my eyes on non-maternity pants. I’m just aspiring to smaller and smaller maternity jeans:

Yesterday, I started wearing Whitney’s XS Old Navy Maternity jeans. Before that, I was wearing Erin’s size M Old Navy Maternity jeans. And I still have my eye on Laurie’s (life-changing I’m sure!) Seven Maternity jeans. In fact, I’d rather squeeze into them than wear my real pants. Sick, right?

In real life, I don’t pay top dollar for jeans. I’m comfortable in the $30 range and might even go up to $50 if I thought they were perfect for me. Unfortunately, I must confess that I did splurge on my own $100 maternity jeans under the mistaken notion that I’d wear them every day for 10 months or more and they’d make me happy with my changing body all the while. The two pairs that I tried were a bummer from the get-go.

The Bella Dahl Jeans had a belly band that rolled up making them lumpy most of the time and also hard to pull up. I paid about $98 with tax for the jeans and another $10 to have them hemmed.

The nice folks at Maternity Xchange allowed an exchange. Yay! I dropped an extra $12 to get some Earl maternity jeans that were notable for the lack of band. Instead, they have some spandex in the pocket area that expand and contract without looking all maternity. Cool, I thought. Welp, the dang things just don’t stay up. Saggy. Are they too big or too small? I never could figure it out. I tried them from five months pregnant through seven weeks post, each week. I guess I’ll keep trying… what the heck do I have to lose at this point?

And I’ll keep trying to wedge into those Sevens too. At least I can wear my super-long maternity shirts.

Milo is a cutie pie.

I once read that we prefer babies that look like our own babies. So, if you had a chunky monkey or baby with sprouts of adorable black hair, you may think that my two boys look like hairless cats. Sad, but I guess it’s possible.

Anyway, when Anne of Sassy Baby Designs sent me a proof of a baby announcement, I fell in love all over again with my cute new baby boy. It’s on my fridge right now, and if I save up some money, I may buy the whole set.

If you’re in the market for a classy photo announcement, Anne can help you get it just right at www.sassybabydesigns.com. Enter code sassy15 when you place your announcement order by June 30, 2007 and receive 15% off your purchase.

Milo at six weeks is quite different from Holden at six weeks. Not in appearance (yet), those little babies could have been stunt doubles for one another had they been working at the same time… but in temperament and behavior.

Here are a few notes:

• Cuddle bug Little Holden liked to be alone in the crib or the cars eat and this one wants to be on me — snuggling in arms or wrapped in a carrier — most of the time. He’s on me by day and on Alec by evening.
• Sleeps in the car seat. Still. This baby had a cold from five days old with sneezing and day-glo snot so we started him off sleeping in the car seat to help him breathe. Now it’s a habit. We had him in our room until last week and just moved him out into the office.
• Nursing is getting easier. I would say the horrific pain was only about two weeks [more on that later], but that the first six weeks are pretty challenging. Now, both the mommy and baby are getting the hang of it.

Gotta run, someone’s grunting for me!

I read about this study on Mom-101 (during a middle of the night feeding) and considered it… how do you praise your child for his efforts and not his talents? Hmmm, sounds hard.

Today I read it in its entirety and consider this piece from NY Magazine required reading in my house: The Power (and Peril) of Praising Your Kids

Is it because my mom just called me from the emergency room to tell me she had a bike accident and broke her pelvis? Is it because I’m going on vacation from my son for 48 hours this weekend and feel nervous about it? Is it because I peed all over my hand yesterday during my glucose test because I have no visiblity beyond my belly?

Or maybe because when I was getting my eyebrows waxed this morning, I suddenly felt hot wax on my upper lip, telling me that although I didn’t request it, the aesthetician assumed I wanted an upper lip waxing.

Or perhaps it’s that I’m terrified of childbirth and fear that my anxiety will be keeping me up at night for the next 90 days. Or maybe that my 2-year old son is refusing to get in the car, go down the stairs or do many of the things I ask without me carrying him.

I think that all these things just built up, and the call from my mom opened the floodgates. I really gotta let it out more often.

Holden is twenty-three months old and seems to be blossoming into a very boisterous kid. Milo is about six and a half weeks now; he’s sleeping somewhat peacefully in the other room and I figure I have a few minutes (if I’m lucky) to jot down some random thoughts for posterity.

The dishwasher and washing machine are both humming along. If I can brush my teeth soon, I’ll have all the bases covered.

• It is not linear. I used to tell Alec this about baby Holden when bad nights would follow good nights. We can’t expect better days to follow good days. Usually bad nights follow good nights and bad days follow good days. It keeps us humble and it keeps the children from behaving too predictably.
• Sleep is slowly consolidating. Now that I’ve put it out there that I don’t expect constant improvement, maybe I’ve allowed myself to say that last night was a good night. I had a six hour stretch between feedings. Sure, Milo slept all of that and at 2am I snuck into his room (our office) and slept on the couch because I expected him to awaken any minute. The 2am feeding was at 4am. Hope I don’t jinx the continuous improvement I’m expecting.
• Nursing takes a lot of time. Yesterday, I experimented with single-side feeding and shortening up the feeding times (from a half hour) to whenever he seemed to lose interest. Consequently, I went from nursing about 9 times to nursing about 11 times. Improvement? I’m not so sure. But I was able to nurse while supervising two rowdy toddler boys eating snacks and play running games at the same time.
• Second babies go lots of fun places. Sure, they may not really appreciate it, but Milo has been to the zoo, music class, the steam trains, and many playdates already.

Holden’s been asleep for more than two hours. It’s my bedtime; and, if I’m lucky, it’s Milo’s too.

If you’re already a stylish-sling-mama, then this Sweet Fletcher sling may be for you. If you are a klutsy first-timer who needs to have things spelled out for you, might I suggest a Baby Bjorn.

When the package arrived, my three-week old son was shrieking and I ripped into the package and stuck my arm through the loop expectantly. I grabbed him awkwardly and inserted him… he stopped crying and I was prepared to love it.

When my husband entered the kitchen, he showed me how baby Milo was on the brink of falling through the back side opening. Oops. Then I looked for the instructions. There was just a picture with a happy mom and baby and limited text… it was not helping me to get it right.

For the next few days, I kept the sling with me. It fits so easily into my bag and the promise of a happily worn baby kept me going. Plus its so darn cute.

Finally at the end of the week, Whitney came over to provide her expert assistance. Once we got the baby in approximately-correctly, I still felt like his soft little skull was vulnerable to doorways and sinks so I certainly wasn’t prepared to try and cook or chase Holden around the playground. The issue is that the baby’s head sticks out beyond the profile of my body.

Even as a second time mom, with a higher level of confidence about wearing my baby than I had way back in 2005, I still found the lack of padding and protection frightening. I feel more secure with my little man tied to my body, Moby-wrap style. Maybe when he can sit up in a cross-legged fashion, I’ll give it another shot. For a newborn sling, however, this is just a little too scary for me.

I just discovered this web site, a place for you to browse other mommy’s secrets. Ideally you will feel less alone when you read that others have done or thought what you’ve done or thought. You might just feel like the world is going to hell in a handbasket and that our generation of moms is a bunch of whiners. I really don’t know where I stand. Because issues change so much from babyhood to toddlerhood to grade-school-hood, don’t expect to relate to everything.

You can’t help but judge when you read these confessions, but the whole thing’s anonymous, so judge all you want. Just a little fun to talk about on the playground later. Seventeen people claim to have used their vibrator in the parking lot of Whole Foods. Hmmm. I was just there today. I didn’t realize I was supposed to bring any *toys* with me.

The quote of the day on True Mom Confessions is
“My son threw up all over the carpet the other night. I left it there hoping the dog would eat it.” If you’ve thought about it or done it, go ahead, confess it.

Between my husband starting our pot roast before going to work and these easy clean-up liner things [meaning that my dinner was ready and on the table at 6pm AND I didn't have to scrub any pot], it almost makes up for the hour and a half Milo and I spent at the Berkeley Bowl yesterday. Almost.